Yoga went much better today than normal. In the past six months that I’ve been going
to the Chiropractor regularly, I’ve recognized that I have one side of my spine
and body that is much more flexible and strong than the other side. That’s mainly because I have a tiny tad of
scoliosis just above my sacrum. I never
guessed that clumsily leaping off a high jump mat and cracking my tailbone in
the 5th grade would echo into my 30’s. A valiant attempt to impress those 8th grade boys had become a miserable preadolescent fail.
My main Yoga problem, however, is not my unbalanced strength
and flexibility – it’s balance. Warrior 3
is a joke for me – you want me to stand on how many feet? Not all of them? I’m quite sure that my instructor can feel my
incredulous eyes boring a hole in the back of her head. This whole issue, or so I thought, caused my
right side balance to be much more stable than my left side balance on most
days. That is, until today.
The past few weeks, I’ve been feeling sore in my left
ear. Saturday morning after my run, it
started to get worse. Monday I was
fevered and the pain was beginning to diminish my appetite. I noticed I could not walk a straight line
down the hall. Yesterday, I admitted to
myself that I was fully into the 3rd day of an ear splitting headache and was going
downhill fast. I left work early to go
to the clinic. After washing my ear,
which felt like they were shooting a stream of water up into my eyeball with a
stun gun, they made me lay on my side while they pulled out a piece of earwax
larger than what should logically fit inside my tiny ear canal. It was big.
And unnaturally gross. It was a
color that things that come out of your head should never be. It was like a train wreck – I was utterly
repulsed but I could not look away. The
culprit? Q-tips. The Dr. said that using Q-tips is like
loading a musket with a tamping rod – it just shoves whatever is in the ear
canal up against the ear drum. Since I
am a fan of really clean ears, it made sense, but I’m going to have to rethink
my affection for the little white cotton covered tamping rods if this is the ultimate
and super nasty conclusion of all things Q-tip.
After she removed the giantific ball of wax, I felt nauseous
and the nurse had to hold me up because the room started spinning. I recovered quickly, spent more than enough at the pharmacy for meds and went to bed early. This morning, after a massive dose of pain
medication and my first round of eardrops since I was a baby, my Yoga practice was unfettered by any concern about my balance. In fact, I’m wondering why I hadn’t decided
to blame my ear wax for a less than stellar practice up to this point. Warrior 3 was a one-footed miracle today –
one that I don’t want Q-tips to ever steal from me again!
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